March 28 weekend 2025 spirituality column

 

Getting Back to the Basics

Family lore from my wife's kinfolk recounts the first time my father-in-law assumed solo caregiving responsibilities for his firstborn infant, Becky, my wife.

Those who retell it say that Becky's mother, Darla, left the house for a church event and gave her young husband, Wilbur, explicit instructions on how to care for their daughter. 

Before driving away, Darla stocked the home with extra diapers, clean bottles, warm blankets, sterilized pacifiers, and Becky's favorite toys – all things imaginable for soothing a crying baby. 

A few hours into the warm evening, their firstborn began to fuss. Wilbur offered Becky a warm bottle, but she wouldn't take it.

He offered a soft blanket, a spoonful of baby food, and a stuffed bear, but nothing seemed to pacify the tiny tot. 

Soon, Becky's protest deteriorated into crying and then transitioned into incessant squalling. A fretful father paced the floor with daughter atop his shoulder, bouncing the bawling babe in hopes of releasing a bothersome burp. 

Nothing. Infant Becky elevated her protest with additional wailing. 

Left afoot, Wilbur did the only thing he could – he picked up the phone to call the doctor. 

At that moment, Becky's mom burst through the door and swept Becky in her arms.  Wilbur hung up and explained how he'd tried everything to no avail. 

"Well," asked Darla, "Did you give her some water?" 

To hear Becky's mother tell it, Wilbur stared at his young wife as cluelessly as if she was speaking Farsi with an Oklahoma accent. 

"You never mentioned that," he said. 

The story has a parallel in Christian tradition when Jesus left his followers alone and returned to his father. He left instructions, but not a lot of detail. 

This lack of detail prompts a lot of Christ-followers to be like my ill-informed father-in-law and say, "Well, Jesus never mentioned that."

For instance, "Jesus never said anything about how to treat the refugee." 

Yes, and Jesus was also completely mute about universal healthcare. 

He made no mention of tobacco or whether Baptists can drink beer, either.

Jesus said little or nothing about common-sense sword or gun control. 

And I suppose these are accurate observations. There's so much that is absent from Jesus' teachings. 

However, much like my mother-in-law, Jesus was fundamentally clear.

For the uninformed, he offered additional clarity when he was asked to name the greatest commandment. 

Jesus replied: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" 

But in case folks didn't understand his basic message, Jesus offered the Golden Rule, a standard in most world religions.

The Message translation of the Bible offers extra transparency of Mathew 7:12. 

"Here is a simple, rule-of-thumb guide for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them." 

Whenever I'm feeling short of divine instruction, this one is my go-to rule. Just treat others the way I would want to be treated. 

This means I ask myself tough questions as if the answers impacted me, like what would I want done if it was my daughter? How would I feel if my kids' school was shot up? Or what if my refugee family had been turned away? Or how will my disabled brother get the health care he needs in his declining years? 

Simple. The answers are there when we want to hear them. 

As soon as Becky's mom gave her some water, the protests ended. But in the future, if we ever leave my new granddaughter with my father-in-law, I'll be sure and tell him, "Wilbur, if you are drinking water, give the baby water, too."

 

-------------------------- 

Sign up to receive this weekly column by email at www.thechaplain.net/newsletter/ or send me your email address to comment@thechaplain.net.  

All of Norris's books can be ordered on Amazon. Autographed copies can be obtained on his website www.thechaplain.netor by sending a check for $20 for each book to 10566 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602.     

 

 

 

 

March 21 weekend 2025 spirituality column

Note to readers: The woman described in this column is a composite character representing the many conversations I've had with those seeking chaplain jobs.

   

You Can Ask and They Will Tell

 

Not long ago, I was working for a hospice group when a woman stopped by my office considering chaplain employment. Touting her recent graduation from a five-week "chaplain course," the 70-year-old still had questions. 

 

With some excitement, she showed her assumptions early. "I'll bet you get to lead a lot of people to Jesus in this job." 

 

"Not really," I said. "Our patients are from many religious and nonreligious backgrounds that I must respect." 

 

"Oh," she said, "So would I need to understand all religions to work here as a chaplain?"  

 

I shook my head, "Honestly, there are far too many religions on this planet to learn them all. My approach is to ask the patient to share their beliefs. I call this strategy Ask. They'll tell.'"   

She tilted her head with confusion, like a dog trying to track a high-pitched sound.   

 

I kept talking, as I tend to do.

   

"When you meet a person from an unfamiliar religion, you can simply ask them what they believe or how they practice their religion.  

"If you are willing to wait for the answers, the question will prompt most folks to tell you all you need to know."

   

I took her silence as an invitation to continue.   

 

"But I caution you to ask your questions with respectful curiosity. You must show a sincerity that outweighs your determination to convert them to your way of thinking.   

"If they sense that you are willing to honor their beliefs, they will be forthcoming.  

 

"This process involves a two-way discourse my theology teacher called 'Listening Love.'  

 

The strategy serves me well as a hospice chaplain as I often ask patients, "How does your faith inform you about dying? 

 

"The answers that sprout from that question have offered me an impromptu course in world religions."   

 

"For instance?" she asked, giving her head an opposite tilt.  

 

I told her about a Hmong couple who asked me to help them retrieve a placenta after they lost their newborn. The grieving couple said they would bury the placenta under a tree so the baby's soul could journey back through the past and become reborn.   

 

When I asked a Muslim father what we could do for his dying child in a combat hospital in Iraq, he asked me to place a Koran in bed with the child.   

When I asked my question of two brothers at the bedside of their dying mother, they described a New Age belief quite foreign to me. Nonetheless, I listened for what they found comforting, and together, we tied a crystal around their mother's wrist.   

 

When I asked a Chinese man what his faith taught him about consoling his dying wife, he suggested we move the hospital bed in the healing direction of feng shui. He saw this movement as the best way to use energy forces to harmonize individuals with their surrounding environment.

  

 I know, these practices seem a bit odd to our Western sense of mainstream religion. Believe me, these encounters pushed me far out of my Christian comfort zone, too.   

When a chaplain begins a dialogue with someone of a different religion, he or she must ask themselves-- "Am I seeking the information because I've targeted them for conversion – or am I seeking the information I needed to show respect for them?"   

 

Concluding my conversation with the woman, I said "If you really want to become a chaplain, you'll need to adopt an approach that opens the faith dialogue.  

Listen to those of other faiths. Only when you show them respect will you be given the opportunity to demonstrate the love taught by your own faith."   

The woman rubbed her chin, releasing some thoughtful tones, but I'm really not sure what her thoughts were. 

 

But next time I see her, maybe I'll employ my own advice and simply ask her. After all, "listening love" is probably a strategy for most all circumstances.  

--------------------------

Sign up to receive this weekly column in your email box at https://thechaplain.net/newsletter/ or send me your email address to comment@thechaplain.net. 

 

All of Norris's books can be ordered on Amazon. Autographed copies can be obtained on his website www.thechaplain.net or by sending a check for $20 for each book to 10566 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602.    

 

March 14 weekend 2025 spirituality column

Chaplain Predicts Fire and Brimstone

 

Today's column comes straight out of ancient times. This is wrath-of-God stuff.  We are talking "Fire and brimstone, baby, right out of the Old

Testament cities of Sodom and Gomorrah.

 

Nah, you know I'm messing with you. You don't read this column to get the hellish diatribe made famous by the televangelists.

 

These preachers often compare the "homosexual debaucheries" of Sodom and Gomorrah with what they see as the decline of America. They use it as a cautionary tale to ban books, define sexes, and shape elections.

 

It's funny how debauchery has often been a favorite of the judgmental crowd. But these preachers don't hold a candle to the combustible prophet Ezekiel.

 

You could even say, "This dude was totally lit."

 

However, he interpreted the sins of Sodom and Gomorrah far differently than our current politicians and preachers.

 

In Ezk.16:49-50, Zeke handed down a detailed indictment as he channeled the voice of God. 

 

"'Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore, I did away with them as you have seen.'"

 

"Did away" is a euphonism. God turned the residents into crispy critters.

 

Ezekiel saw this as a judgment day, not so much for sexual sins, but for very specific sins.

 

1. Arrogance.
2. Selfishness
3. Uncharitable greediness
4. Gluttony.
5. Apathy.

 

Seems to me that the crusty old prophet was clear.

 

Sodomite lives were cut short by fire and brimstone, not so much because of their debauchery, but because they lived selfish, lazy and gluttonous lives without ever extending their hands to help the poor and the hungry.

 

This past month, the US withdrew their hand of charity from hungry people when this Administration shut down the U.S. Agency for International Development, (USAID).

 

The first casualty of selfishness is always the hungry people of the world.

 

Consider the story of Plumpy'Nut. Goofy name, but a grand product to feed the world's hungry.

 

Plumpy'Nut is the brand name for a ready-to-use therapeutic food produced by Edesia, a Rhode Island based company, with USAID funding. It's life-saving paste containing peanuts, milk powder, sugar, vegetable oil, and vitamins and minerals.

 

Typically administered by charities like Doctors Without Borders, a severely malnourished child will consume packets every day for eight weeks to help them regain health.

 

Each box opened is stamped with "From the American people." But now the US is withdrawing that helpful hand and shipments of this crucial product are being turned off and on -- and back off again -- like a spurting hose.

 

William Lambers, author of "Ending World Hunger" voiced his concern last week in a Newsweek editorial.

 

"If USAID closes and funding decreases, they cannot continue to send this paste to the war-afflicted Congo and other countries. We should be increasing our shipments of Plumpy'Nut and other foods to war and famine zones. It makes no sense to shut down USAID especially during a time of massive humanitarian need."

 

Lambers' words resonate with the sermon Bishop Mariann Edgar Budde recently delivered before our 47^th president at the National Cathedral. "Our God teaches us that we are to be merciful to the stranger, for we were all once strangers in this land."

 

This brave pastor said it much better than I, so I'll just channel the hellfire Ezekial and say, "The closure of USAID is a national sin. And that sin has every possibility of bringing a significant weather change."

 

On Monday, Secretary of State Marco Rubio Trump officially canceled 83% of U.S. foreign aid contracts.

Do you feel a hot rain coming?

 

------------------------

 

More info on Edesia at WWW.edesianutrition.org

 

Sign up to receive this weekly column in your email box at https://thechaplain.net/newsletter/ or send me your email address to comment@thechaplain.net. 

 

All of Norris's books can be ordered on Amazon. Autographed copies can be obtained on his website www.thechaplain.net or by sending a check for $20 for each book to 10566 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602.

 

 

March 7 weekend 2025 spirituality column

God's Not finished With This Chaplain, Yet

 

When a reader once left a voicemail suggesting that I wasn't worthy of my chaplain title, I shrugged. That's OK, I thought, I've heard that before. 

 

The worst occasion happened during my USAF deployment to Saudi Arabia in 1999. That's when my supervisor, Col. Mike Bradshaw, told me I wasn't being promoted to the rank of Major.

 

"You'll be reconsidered next year," he promised. "But trust me," he added in his signature truism, "it's really a 'one-chance-mistake-Air-Force.' You won't remain active duty."

 

So, I guess it was appropriate that a few mornings later, I walked into the chapel men's room to evacuate the constipation of my disappointment. Before entering the stall, I followed military tradition and tucked my hat into the beltline at the small of my back. 

 

Before taking my place on the porcelain throne, I noticed the toilet brand name, "Norris." I shrugged. It fit the "career" I was having.

 

I stayed for much longer than I should have. I didn't want to go to the office. How was I supposed to be a supportive chaplain to the deployed troops when I felt so low?

 

Finally, however, I stood to do my "paperwork." As I discarded the paper into the receptacle, I noticed that some careless fool had ditched his hat in my toilet. 

First, I wondered, why hadn't I previously noticed this?

 

But my second and more sober observation was that this fool's hat had a Christian cross affixed on it. That fool was me! 

 

I almost cried looking at my hat in the flusher. Was God using a metaphor to tell me that my chaplain career was in the toilet? If so, was the military my only path of ministry? Or were there other ministry venues? I wasn't sure. 

 

I had no choice but to go to the chapel office and ask our NCOIC (office manager) for a new hat.  As I unfolded my story, Master Sgt. Steve Carothers folded his 6-foot-5-inch frame in half, overcome with near stroke-inducing laughter.

 

He then made a comical demand. "If you want me to give you a new hat, you are going to have to give me just one good reason why I should overlook such a blame fool mistake as that." 

 

"Well," I admitted, "there are some foolish officers in this Air Force who seem like they operate with a head full of crap." 

He shook his head with large, agreeable nods. 

 

"But" I said, "don't you think it takes a really good officer like me to admit that he has a hat full of crap?"

 

Hearing my logic, he dropped to the floor, hysterically beating the tile with his fist.

 

"I give up, Chaplain," he declared. "You got your new hat." 

 

The Bible says in James 5:16, "Make this your common practice: Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can live together whole and healed." 

 

I confessed my mistake—my sin—and got a new hat. But better than that, I got a new ministry.

 

For you see, despite my sinking feeling that my career was flushed in the crapper of chaplain careerism, I had a creatively hysterical moment in which I emailed my "hat-full" story to a Florida friend, a newspaper editor named Tom Clifford. Tom thought it was riotously funny but too inappropriate for a newspaper.

Still, he saw through my "crap," and 10 months later, he invited me to begin this syndicated newspaper column. 

 

Col. Bradshaw had asked me to trust him. Trust is best left to God, not man. Now, almost 25 years after the famous toilet week, I look back over a long and rewarding career as a healthcare chaplain.

 

Better yet, I managed to finish a career in uniform. In 2002, I transferred to the California Air National Guard and was twice promoted, retiring as a lieutenant colonel in 2014.

 

So, now I know that if I ever meet up with Col. Bradshaw again, I'd like to tell him one thing: "Trust me, God's still not finished with me."  

This column was excerpted from my book "Thriving Beyond Surviving."

 —————————– 

Sign up to receive this weekly column in your email box at https://thechaplain.net/newsletter/ or send me your email address to comment@thechaplain.net.

All of Norris's books can be ordered on Amazon. Autographed copies can be obtained on his website www.thechaplain.net or by sending a check for $20 for each book to 10566 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602.