Translation from bad to worse

Is Crap a bad word?

Bonus in today's Newsletter -- My radio interview.   https://www.kvmr.org/podcasts/norris-burkes-chaplain-author-columnist-speaker/ Translating Our Faith to Be Understood   Does Jesus care if you say crap?    If you think that's an odd beginning for a spiritualty column, imagine how I felt when Dr. Richard Cutter asked the same thing in our early morning Greek class at Baylor University in 1978.   Cutter posed the question after listening to my classmate, John, attempt to translate a passage from Plato.    For a second-year Greek student, John was slightly more clueless than I but he was to be commended for his gallant effort.    After three agonizing minutes, Dr. Cutter interrupted John to ask us all, "Do you think Jesus is OK with us saying crap?    Cutter knew most of us were Southern Baptists heading to seminary, so he quickly launched a story to justify his random question.   "A freshman girl recently told me she was offended by my occasional use of 'crap.'"    She told him Jesus wouldn't want us to say, "crap." Apparently, her East Texas church upbringing taught her that it was an expletive.   "Amen, sister," I thought. My Southern Baptist pastor/dad didn't let me say "darn" either.   Cutter told us he'd apologized to the co-ed but explained how he was raised on a Kansas farm where "crap" described everything from the piles scattered in the pasture to the church budget.   Hoping his folksy story had planted the seeds of understanding, he repeated his polling question. "Now, how many of you still think that crap is a bad word?"   We exercised our right to silence. This was our third semester with Cutter and most of us recognized the sound of both barrels being loaded.   "Great!" he said before gripping John's desktop with both hands, "John, that translation was a bunch of crap!"   What Cutter was so colorfully illustrating is something called a "regional sin." These sins may offend the sensibilities of the locals but would not be offensive in other communities.    Regional sins are good to know when you are traveling, but the girl's question illustrates a downside to paying them too much heed.   The downside is that we, like Dr. Cutter's accuser, sometimes use these regional dos and don'ts to define our standard of faith. When we do that, our faith-vision blurs, and we start seeing ourselves as doubly better than others.   For instance, I often heard the ministerial students in our Greek class joke, "I don't cuss, drink, or chew nor date girls who do." This was probably a good health practice, but these three negatives said nothing of the depth of our faith.   Faith is better understood when you leave the regional list of rules at home and replace them with true elements of faith.   Moses did a pretty good job of condensing the hundreds of regional dos and don'ts into something called the Ten Commandments. But Jesus gave Moses an upgrade with Faith 2.0 when he emphasized the two most important of the ten.     He said our faith should hang on these two commandments:   1. Love the Lord your God with all your heart. 2. Love your neighbor as yourself.   No more long lists of complicated regional sins. There are only two things Jesus wants us to do. The two commandments are inextricably bound; you can't follow one commandment to the neglect of the other.   At the end of the day, I think Dr Cutter, was trying to instill his students with a faith built solely on these two commandments. Anything less disintegrates into mistranslated crap.     ------------------------------------------------------------   Read Norris's past columns at www.thechaplain.net. Contact him at comment@thechaplain.net or 10556 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602 or voicemail (843) 608-9715. Twitter @chaplain.

This email was sent to burkesn.norris@blogger.com why did I get this?    unsubscribe from this list    update subscription preferences Norris Burkes · 10566 Combie Rd · Suite 6643 · Auburn, CA 95602 · USA

Column for last weekend of July 2021

Translating Our Faith Through All the Noise

 

Does Jesus care if you say crap?

 

If you think that's an odd beginning for a spiritualty column, imagine how I felt when Dr. Richard Cutter asked the same thing in our early morning Greek class at Baylor University in 1978.

 

Cutter posed the question after listening to my classmate, John, attempt to translate a passage from Plato.

 

For a second-year Greek student, John was slightly more clueless than I but he was to be commended for his gallant effort.

 

After three agonizing minutes, Dr. Cutter interrupted John to ask us all, "Do you think Jesus is OK with us saying crap?

 

Cutter knew most of us were Southern Baptists heading to seminary, so he quickly launched a story to justify his random question.

 

"A freshman girl recently told me she was offended by my occasional use of 'crap.'"

 

She told him Jesus wouldn't want us to say, "crap." Apparently, her East Texas church upbringing taught her that it was an expletive.

 

"Amen, sister," I thought. My Southern Baptist pastor/dad didn't let me say "darn" either.

 

Cutter told us he'd apologized to the co-ed but explained how he was raised on a Kansas farm where "crap" described everything from the piles scattered in the pasture to the church budget.

 

Hoping his folksy story had planted the seeds of understanding, he repeated his polling question. "Now, how many of you still think that crap is a bad word?"

 

We exercised our right to silence. This was our third semester with Cutter and most of us recognized the sound of both barrels being loaded.

 

"Great!" he said before gripping John's desktop with both hands, "John, that translation was a bunch of crap!"

 

What Cutter was so colorfully illustrating is something called a "regional sin." These sins may offend the sensibilities of the locals but would not be offensive in other communities.

 

Regional sins are good to know when you are traveling, but the girl's question illustrates a downside to paying them too much heed.

 

The downside is that we, like Dr. Cutter's accuser, sometimes use these regional dos and don'ts to define our standard of faith. When we do that, our faith-vision blurs, and we start seeing ourselves as doubly better than others.

 

For instance, I often heard the ministerial students in our Greek class joke, "I don't cuss, drink, or chew nor date girls who do." This was probably a good health practice, but these three negatives said nothing of the depth of our faith.

 

Faith is better understood when you leave the regional list of rules at home and replace them with true elements of faith.

 

Moses did a pretty good job of condensing the hundreds of regional dos and don'ts into something called the Ten Commandments. But Jesus gave Moses an upgrade with Faith 2.0 when he emphasized the two most important of the ten. 

 

He said our faith should hang on these two commandments:

 

1. Love the Lord your God with all your heart.

2. Love your neighbor as yourself.

 

No more long lists of complicated regional sins. There are only two things Jesus wants us to do. The two commandments are inextricably bound; you can't follow one commandment to the neglect of the other.

 

At the end of the day, I think Dr Cutter, was trying to instill his students with a faith built solely on these two commandments. Anything less disintegrates into mistranslated crap. 

 

------------------------------------------------------------

 

Read Norris's past columns at www.thechaplain.net. Contact him at comment@thechaplain.net or 10556 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602 or voicemail (843) 608-9715. Twitter @chaplain.

 

Off with their Heads

Ever demand someone's head on a platter?

This week's column was last week's sermon.  See the service on YouTube. https://youtu.be/pdBM35AyXT0 Off with Their Heads   Today's media can often seem like a name-blame-shame game with its frequent demand to have someone's head on a platter, at least in a figurative way.   The language is not new. It recalls the literal beheading of John the Baptist in Mark 6: 14 – 29.   If it's been a minute since you read the passage, John was Jesus' cousin. He was also a popular prophet who publicly condemned King Herod for the despot's illegal marriage to his brother's wife.   As they say in my church, "The preacher stopped preaching and commenced to meddling." So Herod threw the prophet in the clink.    Meanwhile, Herod hosted his birthday party where his stepdaughter, Salome, entertained him with a sultry dance. Stepdad was so pleased with her performance that he offered the girl anything she wanted.    After consultation with her mother, Salome demanded the Baptizer's head on a platter. Request granted.    Gruesome yes, but the intention wasn't much different from the phone call I received while serving as an Air Force chaplain at Patrick Air Force Base in 2002.     Before I could answer with "God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life," the man launched into a story about a sergeant on our base who was "messing with" his wife.   "The UCMJ demands adulterers be prosecuted," he said. "If the sergeant doesn't see some brig time, I'm calling my congressman!"   I mentioned that chaplains don't practice military law, but we were both aware that the UCMJ, the Uniform Code of Military Justice, specifies adultery as a court martial offense.   "I just now left a voice message for the sergeant's commander," he warned. The man definitely wanted the sergeant's career decapitated.   I pressed further, asking the caller how his wife had met this man.   "They never actually met," he said, "but they email each other."   "So, you're going to hurt the sergeant's family for what he's planning to do; not for what he's actually done?"   "This home wrecker is going down!" he said as my receiver went dead.   I suspect my anonymous caller was a proponent of something I call, "The Moses Plan." It's a page from the book of Exodus that demands "eye for eye, tooth for tooth."   However, centuries after Moses suggested this ophthalmological/oral surgery, Jesus employed some skillful hyperbole to introduce his own plan:   "You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.''   I say, 'hyperbole' because if we took the advice literally, we'd all be giving our clothing away piece by piece and soon become a bunch of bruised nudists.   Jesus' strategy does three things. First, it calls for us to re-examine our motives when seeking justice. Second, it removes the necessity of revenge by removing the power from the insult. But most important, it demands that we seek the power of love and forgiveness – which is a much higher level of justice than revenge.   The nuts and bolts of the plan can be difficult, but I've found practical advice in the writings of the apostle Paul who advised readers in Philippians 4:8-9 to find things in people that are "…noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst.The beautiful, not the ugly. Things to praise, not things to curse."   After that phone call, I sat for a moment, hoping the man would call back with a more dispassionate tone. He didn't.   On his end, I imagined him impatiently waiting for a return call from the interloper's commander.   But, knowing that commander as a man who played no part in vengeful games, I can assure you that the angry caller waited a long time for a call that never came.       Column excerpted from Norris's book "Thriving Beyond Surviving."  Read  past columns at www.thechaplain.net. Contact Norris at comment@thechaplain.net or 10556 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602 or voicemail (843) 608-9715. Twitter @chaplain.

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Column for July 23-25 weekend 2021

Off with Their Heads

 

Today's media can often seem like a name-blame-shame game with its frequent demand to have someone's head on a platter, at least in a figurative way.

 

The language is not new. It recalls the literal beheading of John the Baptist in Mark 6: 14 – 29.

 

If it's been a minute since you read the passage, John was Jesus' cousin. He was also a popular prophet who publicly condemned King Herod for the despot's illegal marriage to his brother's wife.

 

As they say in my church, "The preacher stopped preaching and commenced to meddling." So Herod threw the prophet in the clink.

 

Meanwhile, Herod hosted his birthday party where his stepdaughter, Salome, entertained him with a sultry dance. Stepdad was so pleased with her performance that he offered the girl anything she wanted.

 

After consultation with her mother, Salome demanded the Baptizer's head on a platter. Request granted.

 

Gruesome yes, but the intention wasn't much different from the phone call I received while serving as an Air Force chaplain at Patrick Air Force Base in 2002. 

 

Before I could answer with "God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life," the man launched into a story about a sergeant on our base who was "messing with" his wife.

 

"The UCMJ demands adulterers be prosecuted," he said. "If the sergeant doesn't see some brig time, I'm calling my congressman!"

 

I mentioned that chaplains don't practice military law, but we were both aware that the UCMJ, the Uniform Code of Military Justice, specifies adultery as a court martial offense.

 

"I just now left a voice message for the sergeant's commander," he warned. The man definitely wanted the sergeant's career decapitated.

 

I pressed further, asking the caller how his wife had met this man.

 

"They never actually met," he said, "but they email each other."

 

"So, you're going to hurt the sergeant's family for what he's planning to do; not for what he's actually done?"

 

"This home wrecker is going down!" he said as my receiver went dead.

 

I suspect my anonymous caller was a proponent of something I call, "The Moses Plan." It's a page from the book of Exodus that demands "eye for eye, tooth for tooth."

 

However, centuries after Moses suggested this ophthalmological/oral surgery, Jesus employed some skillful hyperbole to introduce his own plan:

 

"You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.''

 

I say, 'hyperbole' because if we took the advice literally, we'd all be giving our clothing away piece by piece and soon become a bunch of bruised nudists.

 

Jesus' strategy does three things. First, it calls for us to re-examine our motives when seeking justice. Second, it removes the necessity of revenge by removing the power from the insult. But most important, it demands that we seek the power of love and forgiveness – which is a much higher level of justice than revenge.

 

The nuts and bolts of the plan can be difficult, but I've found practical advice in the writings of the apostle Paul who advised readers in Philippians 4:8-9 to find things in people that are "…noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst.The beautiful, not the ugly. Things to praise, not things to curse."

 

After that phone call, I sat for a moment, hoping the man would call back with a more dispassionate tone. He didn't.

 

On his end, I imagined him impatiently waiting for a return call from the interloper's commander.

 

But, knowing that commander as a man who played no part in vengeful games, I can assure you that the angry caller waited a long time for a call that never came.

 

 

 

Column excerpted from Norris's book "Thriving Beyond Surviving."  Read  past columns at www.thechaplain.net. Contact Norris at comment@thechaplain.net or 10556 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602 or voicemail (843) 608-9715. Twitter @chaplain.

 

 

 

 

Pop Quiz

Have you lost your freedoms? Part 3

Testing your Religious Freedoms   We all remember the surprise we felt when our high school teacher announced, "Put your books away and take out a piece of paper – Pop quiz!" Well, today's column is a pop quiz to appraise your understanding of Freedom of Religion. It concludes my three-part series celebrating American freedoms.    In each scenario below, you're a healthcare chaplain responding to a patient request. Do you honor the request? Yes or no?  Begin test. You are in a combat hospital where a Muslim child is dying of 3rd degree burns. His father requests that you bring a Koran, read aloud a specific passage, and reverently place the Koran on his child's forehead. A millennial patient practicing new age religion asks you to obtain a healing crystal and tape it around his wrists. In a Catholic hospital, a Baptist pastor asks you to remove the crucifix hanging above the bed of his dying wife. His protestant tradition favors a bare cross to emphasize the resurrected Christ instead of the image of the dying Christ.    OK, put down your pencil. I know you did well, especially if you recognized these scenarios taken from past columns. Let's review.   If you answered, "no," because you want to read from the Bible instead, then I'll repeat what I told my USAF chaplain colleague when he declined this opportunity.   As military chaplains, we serve folks of all religious and nonreligious traditions. We're privileged to preach personal views from Sunday's pulpit. However, when on the battlefield or visiting duty stations, our views remain secondary in the same way a combat medic would set aside her own wounds to attend the wounds of others.    You answered yes, even though it feels "woo-woo" or weird. You know that your opinion has little to do with the patient. You understand that relating to people from other religions requires you to respectfully demonstrate that their beliefs are equally important. Hopefully, you said yes. Or did you decline because it offends your Catholic upbringing?  If so, I'd ask you to consider how denying someone their religious freedom might threaten your future religious choices. After all, what if an ambulance someday takes you to a Baptist hospital? My questions introduce a broader one. Must our faith be binary? Does it represent our way or no way? Is God a yes or no question? An either-or proposition? In relating to other faiths, can we consider answers that are "yes/and."? Is it possible to understand "Freedom of Religion" as something that honors your faith AND mine?   My friend, Gerald Jones, who manages a Roseville chaplain department uses similar questions to screen his potential volunteers.    He asks, "If the family of a dying Buddhist patient asks you to read Buddhist prayers, would you be comfortable doing so?"    If they say "yes," Jones moves the process forward.   If they say no, Jones will ask, "If your family member was dying would you be okay with a Buddhist chaplain reading a Psalm from the Bible?'"    If they say yes, Jones will then ask, "What's the difference?'"    My friend tells me, "Those willing to wrestle with these questions are the ones typically invited to join our training."   Jones and I agree. Hospital Chaplaincy is about patient needs, not chaplain needs. If a potential trainee cannot work in that setting, we encourage other places of ministry.   Finally – a bonus question. A female patient asks you to call her Episcopal parish and specifies they send a male priest. Do you make that call?   Yes, I made the call, but with great trepidation. How did the priest answer?    "Remind my parishioner that she doesn't get to choose who brings the sacrament. She'll get who she gets."   I paused, but I guess he heard my eyes roll, as he replied. "Never mind. I'll tell her myself when I get there."   Wowzer. I guess Freedom of Religion has some limits.    ____________________________________   Norris' books are available at www.thechaplain.net. Contact him at comment@thechaplain.net or 10556 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602 or voicemail (843) 608-9715. Twitter @chaplain.

This email was sent to burkesn.norris@blogger.com why did I get this?    unsubscribe from this list    update subscription preferences Norris Burkes · 10566 Combie Rd · Suite 6643 · Auburn, CA 95602 · USA

Column for July 16-18 weekend 2021

Testing your Religious Freedoms

 

We all remember the surprise we felt when our high school teacher announced, "Put your books away and take out a piece of paper – Pop quiz!"

 

Well, today's column is a pop quiz to appraise your understanding of Freedom of Religion. It concludes my three-part series celebrating American freedoms.

 

In each scenario below, you're a healthcare chaplain responding to a patient request. Do you honor the request? Yes or no?

 

Begin test.

 

1. You are in a combat hospital where a Muslim child is dying of 3^rd degree burns. His father requests that you bring a Koran, read aloud a specific passage, and reverently place the Koran on his child's forehead.

 

2. A millennial patient practicing new age religion asks you to obtain a healing crystal and tape it around his wrists.

 

3. In a Catholic hospital, a Baptist pastor asks you to remove the crucifix hanging above the bed of his dying wife. His protestant tradition favors a bare cross to emphasize the resurrected Christ instead of the image of the dying Christ.

 

OK, put down your pencil. I know you did well, especially if you recognized these scenarios taken from past columns.

 

Let's review.

 

1. If you answered, "no," because you want to read from the Bible instead, then I'll repeat what I told my USAF chaplain colleague when he declined this opportunity.

 

As military chaplains, we serve folks of all religious and nonreligious traditions. We're privileged to preach personal views from Sunday's pulpit. However, when on the battlefield or visiting duty stations, our views remain secondary in the same way a combat medic would set aside her own wounds to attend the wounds of others.  

 

2. You answered yes, even though it feels "woo-woo" or weird. You know that your opinion has little to do with the patient. You understand that relating to people from other religions requires you to respectfully demonstrate that their beliefs are equally important.

 

3. Hopefully, you said yes. Or did you decline because it offends your Catholic upbringing?  If so, I'd ask you to consider how denying someone their religious freedom might threaten your future religious choices. After all, what if an ambulance someday takes you to a Baptist hospital?

 

My questions introduce a broader one. Must our faith be binary? Does it represent our way or no way? Is God a yes or no question? An either-or proposition?

 

In relating to other faiths, can we consider answers that are "yes/and."? Is it possible to understand "Freedom of Religion" as something that honors your faith AND mine?

 

My friend, Gerald Jones, who manages a Roseville chaplain department uses similar questions to screen his potential volunteers.

 

He asks, "If the family of a dying Buddhist patient asks you to read Buddhist prayers, would you be comfortable doing so?"

 

If they say "yes," Jones moves the process forward.

 

If they say no, Jones will ask, "If your family member was dying would you be okay with a Buddhist chaplain reading a Psalm from the Bible?'"

 

If they say yes, Jones will then ask, "What's the difference?'"

 

My friend tells me, "Those willing to wrestle with these questions are the ones typically invited to join our training."

 

Jones and I agree. Hospital Chaplaincy is about patient needs, not chaplain needs. If a potential trainee cannot work in that setting, we encourage other places of ministry.

 

Finally – a bonus question. A female patient asks you to call her Episcopal parish and specifies they send a male priest. Do you make that call?

 

Yes, I made the call, but with great intrepidation. How did the priest answer?

 

"Remind my parishioner that she doesn't get to choose who brings the sacrament. She'll get who she gets."

 

I paused, but I guess he heard my eyes roll, as he replied. "Never mind. I'll tell her myself when I get there."

 

Wowzer. I guess Freedom of Religion has some limits.

 

 

 

 

Norris' books are available at www.thechaplain.net. Contact him at comment@thechaplain.net or 10556 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602 or voicemail (843) 608-9715. Twitter @chaplain.

 

 

Turkish Prison no Picnic.

Have you lost your freedoms? Part 2

Charleston Readers: I will be to town the last week of October 2021.  Additionally, my daughter, Sara, will be in Charleston to talk about the ChispaProject.org.  Please let us know if your organization would like to have one or both of us speak. Freedom's Choice   I once pastored a church where our music minister, Don Smith, often greeted our congregation with a harmonious, "Good morning!"   Sadly, our sleepy parishioners often failed to reciprocate his enthusiasm. On those occasions, Smith fired a question to resuscitate the elderly congregants – "How many of you would rather be here than the best prison in Turkey?"   A few hands rose in cautious favor of their current accommodations, but most offered only a groan.   As kooky as Smith's choice may be, he was trying to give our parishioners some perspective. Ten years later, in 1998, I gained firsthand appreciation of his viewpoint by visiting a Turkish prison.   At the time, I was serving as an Air Force chaplain at the Izmir Air Station, when I answered a phone call from our deputy commander, Lt. Col. Horace J. Phillips.   "Chaplain, how would you like to go to prison today?" he asked.   "Pardon me, Sir?"     Phillips laughed the same "gotcha laugh" he'd often used when certifying me for scuba.    Then, as if clearing his diving mask of seawater, he expelled his bubbly mirth to explain that one of our Security Force members (military policeman) had been detained in the infamous Bucca Prison.   "I need you to accompany the lawyer and myself to the prison to check on the sergeant's welfare."   I drew a troubled breath and asked, "What's the charge?"   "The Turkish Insult Law," answered the base lawyer on speakerphone with Phillips.   The law, still in use today, makes it illegal for anyone to say or do something the government deems offensive. If convicted, our airman was facing a one-to-three-year prison sentence.   Phillips explained that the drunk sergeant "insulted" the Turks by emptying his bladder on a statue of Mustafa Atatürk, the founder of modern Turkey.     "Sounds quite insulting, indeed" I said.   During our one-hour car ride to the prison, the lawyer reminded us that Turkey did not subscribe to the typical get-out-of-jail-free agreement the US military enjoys with most countries. She informed us that normally low-level offences by US servicemembers are addressed by an American military court.   "Unless we can work some magic," she added, "our boy is there to stay."   Just after noon, we presented identification to the guards who then passed us through gates.   Hearing Turkish prison doors close behind you isn't an experience for the faint of heart. The smell suddenly became indescribable. Rats passed us going the opposite direction. It seemed even rodents were plotting their escape.    Every bit of it recalled for me the 1978 film "Midnight Express." The movie follows American college student Billy Hayes, who served four years in a Turkish prison for drug-smuggling before he finally boated across the Maritsa River to freedom.   Soon we found our sergeant pacing his cell, a contrite cop who remembered very little of his escapades. He seemed in no condition to swim for freedom.   I'm not sure how someone detained in a Turkish prison feels when seeing a chaplain enter his cell. But his pale expression suggested he may have been expecting his last rites.   Our lawyer removed her best shot from her briefcase, a typed apology.  She advised him to sign, saying, "If you apologize, we might get you released with your promise to reappear for trial."   By the next day, the Turks welcomed the signed apology and, with a wink to Phillips, allowed the sergeant to board a flight home.   The sergeant's story often lends perspective when I hear folks endlessly complain about restrictions of their personal freedoms, such as taxes, masks, or speed limits on an empty stretch of desert highway.  If Smith and I were leading worship again today, we'd probably ask those complainers to join us in Keith Greenwood's song:   I'm proud to be an American, Where at least I know I'm free. And I won't forget the men who died Who gave that right to me. And I'd gladly stand up Next to you and defend her still today; 'Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land. God bless the USA!   Then, if I thought I heard a lack of enthusiasm, I'd ask them all, "How many of you would rather be here today than the finest prison in Turkey?"   _________________________________________________________   Norris' books are available at www.thechaplain.net. Contact him at comment@thechaplain.net or 10556 Combie Rd. Suite 6643 Auburn, CA 95602 or voicemail (843) 608-9715. Twitter @chaplain.

This email was sent to burkesn.norris@blogger.com why did I get this?    unsubscribe from this list    update subscription preferences Norris Burkes · 10566 Combie Rd · Suite 6643 · Auburn, CA 95602 · USA